


Birth Control Blunder

by andachippedcup



Series: Domestic Belle [11]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-04
Updated: 2013-02-04
Packaged: 2017-11-28 04:07:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/670099
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/andachippedcup/pseuds/andachippedcup





	Birth Control Blunder

Rumplestiltskin had experienced enough loss in his lifetime for Mr. Gold to know the value of a thing (or a person)  _before_  it was gone. Rumplestiltskin had, unfortunately, never learned that lesson. And as far as Belle was concerned, Gold knew he could not overestimate her worth.

So it was that he made damn certain his little Belle was well taken care of. He had existed for enough time with his false memories to have a rather thorough understanding of the world, whereas his dear Belle…well, she had not and did not, even after some time, fully understand the world in which they now found themselves.

Thus, it was always him that set up her appointments with any and all individuals in the health profession. It had taken quite a lot of coaxing to get her to sit through her first dentist’s appointment (the moment the dentist had put on his little face mask and light and tried to poke at her mouth with a metal instrument, Belle had clocked him about the head). In fact, it took a great deal of persuasion to get Belle to go and an even greater amount to persuade the dentist to see her. Some threatening might have contributed to Belle always getting an appointment despite her poor patient etiquette at the dentist but really, what was he supposed to do, ask nicely?

Still, that was all child’s play compared to what he was tasked with that day, courtesy of Mary  fucking Margaret and her damnable daughter.

It had been shortly after the vaccination debacle at the doctor’s office (he’d insisted on Belle getting every vaccination under the sun, from chicken pox to tetanus). Belle had whimpered with every shot, prompting him to repeatedly threaten the doctor until the whole ordeal was over. It had left Belle plastered in little rubber ducky bandaids from head to toe, one for each shot she’d bravely endured. After the whole mess, she’d gone off for coffee with ‘the girls’ and he had returned home and occupied himself with the paper. When at last his wife came back, she was insistent about needing a gynecologist appointment because “Mary Margaret and Emma said it’s important.”

He’d gently dismissed the idea, saying that as Belle was perfectly healthy and the pair of them were only seeing each other, there was really no need. She wasn’t pregnant. She wasn’t in pain or discomfort. She was vibrant and young and healthy and really they didn’t need any more awkwardness in their lives.

“That’s not what Emma and Mary Margaret said; they said that  _especially_  now that we’re married, I ought to go.” Belle had repeated the words and he’d shifted uncomfortably, well aware of what activity the women were referring to that would necessitate Belle going to the gynecologist ‘especially’ now.

He’d caved quickly because really, what Belle wanted, Belle got.

So it was that a week and a half later, they’d walked into the waiting room of the doctor’s office together and signed her in, then waited, patiently flipping through horribly outdated magazines until a severe looking dirty blonde nurse called Belle and they both rose, hand in hand and followed her down the hall.

He was quite certain no other husbands were prone to following their wives in these dark halls but there was no way in hell he’d be leaving his little Belle alone to face the horrors of the Gynecologist’s office alone. Even if it meant suffering through what was bound to be a horribly awkward hour with all the clinical terms for lady parts being thrown about haphazardly.

The things he was willing to endure for love.

They’d been shown to a room and left alone to wait on the doctor. He’d sat down and nervously massaged his knee while Belle had prowled about the room, exploring to satisfy her own curiosity, he assumed.

“Rum, look at this!” She’d whispered and held up a colorful hard plastic object. She’d offered it to him and he’d taken it hesitantly, holding it at arm’s length until she read the little placard in front of the place where the item had sat.

“What is it, dearie?” He asked, half fearing the answer.

“It says… it says it’s a replica of a uterus, ‘to scale’.” Belle read off the little sign and the plastic uterus nearly fell from his hands as he fumbled with it, eager to be rid of the blasted thing. After he had leaped out of his chair and desperately thrust the model back onto its shelf, Belle had giggled and moved onto the next, this one of a fetus in the womb at differing stages.

Belle had still been inspecting the little model fetuses when a knock had sounded at the door and a very uncertain looking Whale had entered, only to catch sight of Gold and go positively pale.

Good. The man ought to be scared.

Whale was followed by a little wisp of a woman that Gold recognized as a dryad from the old world, apparently a nurse in this one. Ah yes; he vaguely recalled something about a female having to be present in the room with the doctor when a woman visited the gynecologist. Good. More witnesses to prevent Whale from overstepping his bounds.

“Good afternoon.” Doctor Whale offered in a hoarse voice before clearing his throat and attempting to speak again. “How are you this afternoon, Mrs. Gold?” Whale asked tentatively and Belle smiled shyly as she set down the model fetus and flitted back to the patient table.

“I’m quite alright, thank you.” She murmured. “A little nervous, honestly.”

“That’s perfectly normal and I assure you I will be the picture of professional.” Whale commented, though the words seemed directed more at Gold than at Belle.

“Damn right you will.” Gold muttered under his breath as he crossed his arms before him, already in a foul mood with all of this.

“I just have a few questions for you before we get started with your exam.” Whale muttered and flipped open his clipboard, staring entirely too hard at the paper. “Now, some of these questions might seem a bit, ah…  _personal_  but honesty is important.” He advised and Gold watched with a measure of amusement as a single bead of sweat traced down the side of the young doctor’s face.

What followed was a series of questions Gold, if he’d had his druthers, would never have had asked of his wife. Among them were the date of the first day of her last menstrual cycle, a few questions about her sexual activity (she’d blushed tremendously during that portion, about the only positive thing to result from the questions). Gold had cackled silently when, after being asked that question, he’d interrupted to help Belle answer. She’d swatted him gently and her blush had deepened but the best part had been watching Whale’s eyes bulge. Apparently people in Storybrooke were still continually astonished that a woman such as Belle would allow a man such as himself to be her husband in all ways.

The questions continued after that, though he dared not interrupt again. There were questions regarding her comfort and a rather uncomfortable few questions regarding birth control and the possibility of her being pregnant.

He’d tried to hide the flash of interest that had sprung up in him at mention of that subject. After all, looking too keen might frighten the poor girl and really, he was happy enough to call her wife alone. He didn’t need anything more than that. There was, he was quite certain, a limit to how happy a person was allowed to be, especially in a town that had been cursed by the likes of Regina.

But they were trying. Or so they’d agreed.

Belle had no knowledge of her own mother’s medical history, her mother having passed on quite early in Belle’s life. As such, Whale was keen on doing a few tests that sounded none too pleasant to Gold but Belle was adamant that she would receive a full examination and so she would.

As Belle answered Whale’s questions, he took her vitals down under Gold’s ever watchful eyes. The man need only allow his fingertips to stray an inch or two in the wrong direction and he’d receive a cane to the face faster than you could say ‘dearie’.  

But Whale behaved himself (apparently his sense of self preservation was strong enough to override any urges that a woman as beautiful as Belle might awaken in him). And so, once the prerequisites of the examination were over with, the doctor nervously spoke up.

“Well…Belle, shall we start? The sooner we begin-” Again, he glanced Gold’s way, “-the sooner we can be done with the whole awkward thing.” He offered what was probably meant to be a reassuring smile to Belle, who nodded shyly but the smile only angered Gold more.

Of course the dirty little bugger wanted to get started. The fool was probably just  _itching_ to get his hands on Belle. Whale wasn’t a man he trusted to shine his boots, let alone examine his wife but Gold really didn’t have any choice.

Whale was, after all, the only doctor in the whole damn town qualified to act as Belle’s gynecologist. Gold was 99.9% certain that was yet another of Regina’s evil little ‘fuck you’s, thrown into the curse just for kicks.

_Witch bitch._

“First off I’ll need to do a…erm… _breast exam_.” Whale commented, avoiding Gold’s gaze as he stepped slowly closer to Belle. The bloke was doing his best to look anywhere but in Gold’s direction. It was no small wonder why; as Belle tried to give her husband a reassuring look, the man was trembling from head to toe, his hands clenched in white knuckled fists and his jaw set as he glared daggers at the doctor.

“Is that positively necessary?” He inquired, sidling closer so that he stood beside his wife where she was seated on the paper covered table. Whale squirmed uncomfortably for a moment and then nodded.

“It’s just to be certain that you haven’t got any suspicious lumps or the like.” Whale explained, his gaze directed at Belle. It was Gold who answered him, however.

“She hasn’t, I could have told you that much. Her breasts are perfect-” he paused, offering a roguish glance Belle’s way as he stretched out the word for emphasis, “-ly lump-free. Believe me.” He smirked arrogantly at Whale. “So we can skip that funny business. There’s no need for  _you_ to check them.” Gold growled, placing a protective hand across the small of Belle’s back. She shot him a stern look, clearly not a fan of him bullying the doctor.

“Rum,” she warned in a low voice meant just for him, “let Doctor Whale do his work. Mary Margaret said this is important… to prevent cancer and that stuff.” Belle finished after a long pause, having had to come up with the right word, he imagined. The names of various health afflictions in this world were still new to her and sometimes it took her a moment to come up with a term.

They shared a long look until he finally dropped her gaze, torn between his desire to be certain that Belle was free of any life threatening health issues and his desire to keep Whale’s damn hands off of his wife.

When Belle gently grabbed the hand at her back and patted it gently, he knew he had lost.

“Fine. But be quick about it. And if you so much as  _look_  too hard at them I’ll have your license for it. And then your head.” Gold hissed at Whale, who gulped and gave a wide-eyed nod in acknowledgement of the direct threat. “And put some damn gloves on; heaven only knows where your filthy little paws have been.” Gold sniffed unpleasantly.

And thus began the most uncomfortable hour of Gold’s entire life, both as a pawnbroker and an imp alike. Whale had, blessedly, been quick, taking no more than a minute to do the actual breast exam. He’d even been so kind as to instruct Belle on how to give herself an examination to check for lumps and other concerns. Gold had thought that once the breast exam was over they’d gotten through the worst of it. He was wrong. Terribly, terribly wrong.

The breast exam was to be followed by a urine sample, for which Belle very shyly departed, leaving the two men to square off in silence as she went into the little side restroom. That part hadn’t been so bad, though Belle had seemed thoroughly mortified when she’d returned, the little sample bag in hand. She was nothing if not a lady and he knew that this whole business was inherently against her lifelong teachings but she was doing it. For herself as much as for him. Bless her heart.

 And then Whale had said the words that had made Gold clench the handle of his cane and start to lift it, until Belle’s hand slapped him sharply in reproof.

“Now it’s time to do the pelvic exam.” Whale stated nervously, his eyes wide as Gold was prevented from bashing his face in by Belle’s quick reflexes. “It’s necessary but I’ll be entirely professional!” Whale defended himself, hands held in front of his body in a motion of innocence. Gold just gave him a silent snarl and shook his head.

“You don’t need to do this dearie.” He offered Belle pleadingly as he held her hand. Belle smiled in response and tucked a lock of his hair behind his ear. Normally the action would have been comforting but he knew her much too well. That was her anxious, nervous smile; her eyes were too laden with worry and her smile showed too many teeth to be genuine.

“I’ll be fine. It’s all for the best.” She reminded him and he nodded stiffly, holding her hand as she followed Whale’s instructions and got into place on the table, her feet up in a pair of odd metal stirrups that Gold did not like the look of  _one single bit_.

Shifty little metal devices, they were, not to be trusted.

“Alright, that’s it. Now, Belle I need you to relax your shoulders and your legs. Try to let your stomach muscles relax as much as possible and breathe deeply with your mouth open. You’ll be more comfortable if you can do all of that.” Whale instructed as he slipped on a new pair of gloves (at Gold’s insistence, of course). When he seated himself on a stool at Belle’s feet, however, Gold had had enough.

“No, no that’s quite enough of that. We’re done.” He snapped and grabbed Whale by the collar of his lab coat and yanked the bloke away. “I’ll not have you sniffing about my wife’s nether-regions like this. It’s absolutely uncalled for. She’s in picture perfect health. You’ll have to get your kicks elsewhere, Whale. You won’t be getting a peek at her lady bits.” He snapped menacingly. The nurse sidestepped, looking as though she wanted to intervene but knew better than to anger the likes of Mr. Gold.

“Enough.”

He could not remember ever having heard Belle speak so decisively before and with such command but she did so now, clearly unhappy with him.

“Belle, darling I just think he can finish without going south of the Mason-Dixon line-”

“I know what you think. And you told me that you could handle this and that was the only reason I let you come in with me. I think you’ve proved that you can’t handle this. Nurse, would you  _please_ escort my husband outside?” Belle demanded coldly. His jaw dropped open and he was so taken aback by his wife’s behavior that he didn’t even have the nerve to resist the nurse as she guided him out of the room.

His darling little Belle had just  _kicked him out of the room_.

It was frustrating in the extreme.

——-

“You really don’t have to kick him out, Mrs. Gold. In fact I think it would be best if we brought him back or else-” Doctor Whale chattered nervously as they waited for the nurse to return but Belle wasn’t having it.

“Or else what? You’re afraid my husband will whip you with his cane on suspicion of you feeling me up? Well Doctor Whale, rest assured that he won’t. He likes to play the villain, my husband, but to put it in the vernacular, he’s what would you call it? ‘Whipped’? The point is, he won’t do anything of the like if I tell him not to, so you’re safe.” Belle instructed calmly, pointing a level stare Whale’s way.

The doctor shifted nervously for a moment and finally exhaled loudly and nodded, though he still didn’t appear entirely convinced.

Oh well; Belle was used to people discounting her power. But when it came to her husband, she was quite justified in being confident in herself. Rumplestiltskin was an imp to most but she had him wrapped around her little finger, in a manner of speaking.

“I did want to ask you something, Doctor Whale.” Belle pressed, some of her earlier confidence abating. “You…you have to keep things confidential, correct? I mean, if I were to discuss something with you, you wouldn’t tell my husband, would you?” She asked nervously and she could see Whale’s earlier discomfort returning.

“Your health and wellbeing is your own business, Mrs. Gold. As a doctor I have to uphold strict confidentiality laws. So do the nurses.” He added as he gestured briefly to the nurse. “If you don’t want your husband to know, he won’t.” He gulped and Belle wondered for a moment why he seemed so afraid of whatever she was going to ask him.

“Good. I need to ask you about birth control then.”

Whale looked at her in confusion for a moment and flipped through the chart he’d been writing on for the duration of her visit before returning to look at her.

“Were you looking to switch from your current birth control medication, Mrs. Gold?” He asked in puzzlement.

“No, that’s not it at all. I don’t have any. But I want some. I  _need_ some. So, whatever you have that will help make sure I get pregnant, please, I want it.” She pleaded and he looked at her in confusion.

“You…you  _want_ to get pregnant?” He asked, apparently struggling with the notion of anyone wanting to reproduce with Mr. Gold but also trying to understand Belle’s misguided understanding of how birth control worked.

“Yes!” Belle exclaimed brightly, smiling somewhat embarrassedly. “I just…we’ve been trying. For  _two months_ and we haven’t had any luck and then someone said something about birth control and I didn’t realize… but if there’s something that can control these things and can make me pregnant, I want it.” Belle beamed after her little rambling speech and Whale was at a loss for words for some moments.

“M-Mrs. Gold, I think you’ve misunderstood how birth control works…” He trailed but Belle only frowned in puzzlement.

“What’s to understand? There’s a pill that controls giving birth and I want the one that will help me to  _give birth_.” She sighed, a bit frustrated now.

“Mrs. Gold…birth control isn’t meant to  _help_ someone  _become_ pregnant – it’s meant to _prevent_ pregnancy.” Whale explained and Belle grew very still, her cheeks flushed a pale pink as she gritted her teeth.

“You mean it…it doesn’t get you pregnant?” She asked and Whale shook his head. Belle deflated and bit her lip, trying to hold back the feelings of defeat and foolishness that overwhelmed her. “Is there…is there  _something_ that can? Get me pregnant, that is. Because we’ve been trying for  _two months_ and at this point I’m beginning to wonder if I’m cursed. I don’t know if I can  have children because if I could wouldn’t I have been pregnant by now? Something  _must_ be wrong, right? It’s been  _two months_!” She repeated somewhat hysterically and buried her face in her hands.

Whale stood staring at her, completely dumbfounded as he looked around, almost willing the nurse to save him from what was quite possibly an even more awkward situation than when Belle’s husband had been threatening to bash his skull in.

“Not-not necessarily Mrs. Gold. It takes many couples more than two months to conceive. We can run blood tests today and a few other tests to look at your hormone levels and see what’s happening but I suspect your body is just taking its time. It takes some couples years to conceive, even with everything working the way things should. I wouldn’t worry just yet.” Whale reassured her and Belle beamed at him through her tears, her heart full near to bursting.

“You’re certain? I’m not…I’m not defective?”

“We’ll run the tests but thus far I see no reason to suspect infertility or any other issues that might prevent conceiving. At least, not on your end.” He added as an afterthought, still rather thunderstruck at the notion of a woman as beautiful as the brunette before him trying to conceive a child with the ogre of a wee man she was married to. The idea of Mr. Gold as a father was laughable and yet, it might be something that came to pass in the future- the very near future, if Mrs. Gold got her way.

——-

“I’m sure it’s fine, Mr. Gold. I’ve had plenty of appointments at the Gynecologist’s before.” Ruby beamed from her seat across from him in the waiting room. “It’s fine. After the breast exam they’ll do a pelvic exam where Doctor Whale will check  _everything_ out… _down there_ ,” Ruby suppressed a red lipped smile, “and then the doctor takes the speculum and uses it to-”

“ _Thank you_  Ruby. That’s quite enough. I don’t need or want to imagine any more than that.” Gold scrambled, flustered beyond all belief as he envisioned his little Belle back in those damnable metal stirrups with Whale somewhere he certainly didn’t belong.

“Anytime Mr. Gold. Like I said, Belle will be fine. She’s in good hands. After all, she’s with Dr. Whale, right? He’s got  _plenty_  of experience. And  _lovely_  hands.” Ruby intoned with a smirk, her words making Gold’s hands spasm faintly as he tried to resist the urge to sprint back and rip the exam room door off its hinges. Belle wouldn’t thank him for that but he’d rest easier knowing Whale wasn’t pawing at his wife against her will.

“Ruby-” he warned but his voice was weak even to his ears, the strain and pent up anxiety making itself known.

“Mr. Gold  _relax_. There’s really nothing attractive about a doctor with a speculum checking out a girl’s bits. I promise. Besides, Whale isn’t Belle’s type. She’s more a fan of older vintages, as I’m sure you well know.”

Oh, the wolf girl was having entirely too much fun at his expense.

“Yes, older vintages, very clever Ruby.” He snapped sullenly.

“I thought so.” Ruby grinned, quite full of herself.

At that point, he got up and leaned heavily on his cane as he paced back and forth in the waiting room. It wouldn’t bring Belle back to him any sooner but it would at least distract him from some of the hideous thoughts of Whale enjoying Belle’s company  _too_ much.

——-

“And that’s it.” Doctor Whale said as he removed his gloves and washed his hands at the sink. “How do you feel Mrs. Gold?” He asked as Belle pulled herself into a sitting position, her cheeks still flushed with embarrassment as she eyed the nurse and then Dr. Whale.

“F-fine.” She offered softly and then after a heartbeat she added. “And you’re sure there’s nothing wrong… _down there_?” She queried with a little gulp and Whale tried to smile reassuringly.

“Quite. We’ll still run all the tests but everything seemed in order. Should you wish to conceive, I see no reason why ah…why you and Mr. Gold should be unable.”

Whale shifted uneasily and Belle frowned as she started at the doctor, not understanding what had him so ill at ease. Her husband had departed the room, a fact which would have calmed most, yet Whale still seemed tense.

“Mrs. Gold, I know it’s really none of my business but do you really think it wise?” Whale asked suddenly as he lifted his head, his gaze serious as he met hers head on. Confused, Belle started at him all the harder.

“Do I think what’s wise, Doctor Whale?”

“Having a child. With your husband. With all due respect Mrs. Gold, your husband is hardly known for his compassion around town and many people question your own involvement. If you’re being held against your will, say the word and we can get you to safety. I happen to have a spare room myself.” Whale advised seriously, his tone grave.

Belle, for the life of her, could not keep a straight face as she dissolved into laughter, clutching her sides tightly through the thin paper gown. Whale watched her, thunderstruck, until she could finally compose herself.

“I’m sorry Doctor Whale, it’s not funny, really it’s just… the idea that my husband would force me to do anything against my will is just… well, it’s silly, really. I assure you, we’re quite happy and I’ve no intention of running away unless he’s by my side.” Belle smiled and hopped off the examination table, trying to ignore the look of disbelief on the nurse’s face.

Apparently the idea that anyone could be in love with Mr. Gold was utterly impossible for some people to grasp. It was sad really, that people could be so superficial.

“If you need any further reassurance that my wife is happy, Doctor Whale, I would suggest you come by our home some evening.” From the door, her husband emerged unbidden, smiling, his cane hanging at the crook of his elbow as he squeezed into the examination room and went to Belle’s side, placing a kiss on her forehead as he took up his post beside her.

Whale was white as a sheet as he watched the pawnbroker swagger in and the nurse looked like she might well faint but Belle only smiled as she greeted her (as always) overprotective husband.

Well, she smiled until he said the last bit of his speech.

“If the neighbors are to be trusted, Dr. Whale, you should be able to hear from outside just how pleased my wife is. She’s quite loud, if you catch my meaning.” He grinned and Belle flushed scarlet, mortified at the insinuation. Whale only nodded faintly and fled, the nurse hot on his heels, leaving a thoroughly red cheeked and most assuredly not defective Belle with her altogether too self satisfied husband in their wake. 


End file.
